Saturday, June 19, 2010

Side effects

So my blog design for this page is still really bothering me. I don't know if its perhaps the two column thing I have going, or the super scrap-bookie header...I'm not sure, but I don't feel settled here yet. It's driving me crazy actually....

Another thing...not having time to write until mid-night, but knowing I can't spend a lot of time writing because I'll be completely exhausted when I get up in the morning and have to plug along all day taking care of my darling, but exhausting, kiddos.

Worse yet....staying up knowing that when I finally do decided to try and go to sleep, I'll at most be able to get 3 hours in a row before I wake up for some unknown reason, and then it takes me a solid hour to work myself back into a sleepy state. Insomnia is not a side affect I expected to have being married to the Navy.

Amazingly enough though...life continues to go on. :) Did I mention that we watched the Hub's boat leave this time? I've watched the boat come in several times...there is such a relief for me to see it and know that we are in the same town again, even if it's hours before I can actually talk to or see him. Watching the boat leave...well obviously a completely different effect. I decided to do it because my Mom was in town, and she hadn't seen the boat yet and I thought she would enjoy it. And she did...but I must say it's not something that I will want to do again. It was heartbreaking watching it leave. Oh, me and Pollyanna waved and blew kisses at the boat, and I tried to make it as pleasant and upbeat as possible but....the further towards the horizon the boat traveled, the lower my heart sank.

I think I can now be satisfied with a quick kiss through the car window in the wee hours of the morning, and allowing myself to cry on the ride home, so that I can buck myself up once I step through the door and assume my role of temporary single parent.

Here's a pic of me and Pollyanna saying goodbye to Daddy...



until next time,

5 thoughts:

Kenyon and Jeannette Petersen said...

Hey lady I wish I had some words of advice or something but I don't know what you're going through so I'll just say I hope things start getting better! Maybe sometime soon you'll be able to find some time to catch up and talk to me! Until then good luck with your hectic life!

Mostly Stacie's Space said...

(((HUGS)))

Mostly Stacie's Space said...

Love the cute videos on the other blog, but it wouldn't let me leave a comment there to tell you. So I am leaving it here. :)

trish kaze said...

Hey Jen,even though I haven't been through what you have yet, I know it must be hard. I know that someday soon I will have to go through it but you are such a strong person and I know you will get through it. HUGS! Love ya, -Trish

Katrina said...

Jen, thanks for taking me to see Ericks boat leave that day, it was really nice of you and I have to tell you now that I was crying right along with you that day, but a mom has to be strong so I didn't show it...LOL....any way hang in there it will get better. Can't wait to see you again in the Fall... love to the kids and you too.