Wednesday, March 30, 2011

It's official...

Well it's official. I am 29. I have entered my last year in my twenties. Weird. I don't feel 29. Honestly...sometimes at moments I feel like I'm a little girl "playing" house....although never in my wildest imaginations did I "play" that I was a military wife, with two children under the age of 3, and a husband who deployed for 1/2 the year.

Life just evolves...and the next thing you know, those are your challenges, and you are doing something in a millions year you never thought you could do. Things you still don't feel capable of doing...but you do them anyway...

I am strangely anxious ( and by anxious I mean riddled with anxiety) about homecoming. Almost as bad as it was during the load-out period before deployment. Wow, I've spent almost every day of the last 6 months wishing I could be with him, and now it's almost here and  I'm...lol...scared.

My more experienced Navy-wife friends tell me that it's normal. I told Skunky in an email recently, how I was nervous and scared for homecoming and his response was so simple...and so heartwarming it took my breath away;

"You are everything to me!  I cannot let that go or even fade just because of some small worry that might eat me up inside if I focus too hard on it!"

The man is a genius. I don't know how many times various members of my family have told me to "not worry over things you can't control" and yet Skunky is the only one who could say it in a way that made it click.

So...29 is going to be a new year for me. I'm turning over a new leaf, and I'm going to release my worries of what I can't control, and try my darnedest to live IN the moment! Every moment that I have with Skunky, Pollyanna, and Piglet is a blessing that should be treasured! Heavenly Father intended for me to be happy, and not live my life 'focused on worries that might eat me up inside'.


Happy birthday to Me. Happy birthday to me. Happy biiiiiirthday to meeeeee. Happy birthday to ME!

9 thoughts:

Navy Princess said...

I sent you a happy birthday email, but HAPPY BIRTHDAY on your blog just the same. lol! Wish I was there to help you celebrate, but alas... I am halfway across the world in a place that despises me. lol.

Those anxious feelings are totally normal... I just had that same experience in November, apparently for the last time ever... and I will never forget how freaked out I was.

Hang in there... he is almost home!!!! You have earned your pink dolphins girl! Job well done!!!

Nicky said...

Happy Birthday!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Undaunted ~ My Life One Day at a Time said...

Happy Birthday! I am not sure that the playing dress up feeling goes away for a few more years yet. Marc and I have both felt that way but it seems to be fading these days. You should have your home teachers or bishop give you a blessing. It will help you remember the truth of your hubbys words. Love ya, Have a great day. :)

annoyed army wife said...

Happy birthday! I'm so excited Skunky is going to back home very soon! I was really anxious for OccDoc to come home, but that might have been the driving through a blizzard to pick him up. LOL! It's completely normal. How are the kiddos doing with it?

Mille said...

Happy birthday sweetie!
I hope you have an amazing day... and, CONGRATS on being so close to homecoming ;)
Have a wonderful birthday and enjoy every minute of it!

Poekitten said...

Happy Birthday!

housewife said...

Happy birthday

Katrina said...

Happy Birthday Jen, even tho we have already talked early this morning I wanted to state it here too. I love sweet daughter and thanks so much for the picture if the kids, I see a change in both of them even tho it has only been almost a month since I saw them last. Please share more now that you have that wonderful new camera.:) Love to each of you.

MrsMcDancer said...

Happy Belated Birthday!