What A Weekend

I've been thinking about this post since Friday...but the post I would have written on Friday would have been all self- pitying ( not that there won't be a little of that in this post also!) and sad, cause that was the mood I was in. But after the weekend that I have had, things are a little different in my mind now. :)

"Underway Days", or the first day or two after my husband heads underway, are always difficult for me. I know that those of you who have dealt with frequent separations from you spouse understand what I am speaking of. You have that empty feeling that just follows you around for a couple of days...maybe not every minute of the day, you have tasks that take your mind off of it, or screaming children, or friends that come calling. But then during that quiet minute when the kids are asleep, or playing quietly while you fix dinner for one less mouth, the emptiness catches you again and you can't help but feel completely alone in the world.

That was my mindset on Friday evening. So what did I do? I took me and my daughter to the grocery store, bought every comfort food I could think of...cardboard pizza, chips and dip, reese's mini pb cups, snickerdoodle cookies, and icecream...and gorged myself for the night. Well...I actually only ate the pizza, one cookie, 2 handfuls of chips and dip, and maybe 6 or 7 mini pb cups. ( That's still alot for my increasingly small preggo stomach). I felt full going to bed, but not sick. Until I woke up at 1am when my stomach decided to eject all of that hard emotional eating I had done. Then ensued a not very pleasant night of stomach cramping and no sleep, and at 7am when my 18 month old started to stir, I knew I was in trouble. The saddest part was that I had told a friend of mine I would baby sit their 3 girls while they went on a date to celebrate her husbands birthday. But I knew I was BARELY going to be able to keep track of my own kid that day, let alone 3 other children. So, I called my friend, told her the situation, called around to find someone to replace me, and by 8:15 was sitting downstairs in my rocking chair while my daughter sipped on her sippy cup full of milk watching cartoons and thought to myself ' You're not gonna make it today girl. You need to see if someone can come watch her this afternoon so you can get some sleep'.

Well, in the process of texting another friend to see if she'd be willing to come over for the afternoon, I get a phone call...from my husband! Aparently they had indeed left, but had to turn around and come back because of some important equipment malfunctioning, and he had about 36 more hours of freedom before he had to report back to the boat and they could try to head underway again. I was so grateful for this news I cried.

I can say one thing this life in the Navy has taught me so far is that, Heavenly Father really is on my side. There have been numerous time that things have been delayed, or something has gone 'wrong' that has been a direct benefit to me personally. I know that my Heavenly Father loves me, and I KNOW that we will not give you more then you can handle, and if it seems like he does, he makes a way.

So my husband took care of our little girl while I slept off this horrible stomach bug yesterday, and today we got a few hours to play together as a family before sending him off once again to the boat this evening. It was bitter sweet as always, more so I think because my husband seemed to have a harder time leaving today then he did on Friday. I however am doing better. Possibly because it's evening and it means bed and a new start tomorrow. And also..tomorrow is Monday! Routine begins again and a week will fly by and bam! We're one week closer to being together again!

It certainly was one heck of a weekend, but I made it...with both my husband AND my Heavenly Father on my side. :)

Until next time,
Jen