Side effects

So my blog design for this page is still really bothering me. I don't know if its perhaps the two column thing I have going, or the super scrap-bookie header...I'm not sure, but I don't feel settled here yet. It's driving me crazy actually....

Another thing...not having time to write until mid-night, but knowing I can't spend a lot of time writing because I'll be completely exhausted when I get up in the morning and have to plug along all day taking care of my darling, but exhausting, kiddos.

Worse yet....staying up knowing that when I finally do decided to try and go to sleep, I'll at most be able to get 3 hours in a row before I wake up for some unknown reason, and then it takes me a solid hour to work myself back into a sleepy state. Insomnia is not a side affect I expected to have being married to the Navy.

Amazingly enough though...life continues to go on. :) Did I mention that we watched the Hub's boat leave this time? I've watched the boat come in several times...there is such a relief for me to see it and know that we are in the same town again, even if it's hours before I can actually talk to or see him. Watching the boat leave...well obviously a completely different effect. I decided to do it because my Mom was in town, and she hadn't seen the boat yet and I thought she would enjoy it. And she did...but I must say it's not something that I will want to do again. It was heartbreaking watching it leave. Oh, me and Pollyanna waved and blew kisses at the boat, and I tried to make it as pleasant and upbeat as possible but....the further towards the horizon the boat traveled, the lower my heart sank.

I think I can now be satisfied with a quick kiss through the car window in the wee hours of the morning, and allowing myself to cry on the ride home, so that I can buck myself up once I step through the door and assume my role of temporary single parent.

Here's a pic of me and Pollyanna saying goodbye to Daddy...



until next time,

6am might just be too early for my marriage :)

So I have a dilemma about how to use my time in the morning. Duder gets up between 6 and 630 to nurse, which is all fine and dandy, but Crazy Girl doesn't typically want to start her day until about 8am. Previous to Duder joining our ranks, this worked PERFECT for me! I, myself, am not a morning person, so being able to sleep until 8 am was a huge blessing. I'm pretty sure that once Duder is a little older he'll fall into the same pattern as his sister, and then we can all go back to being sleepheads in the morning. :) But for now I struggle between getting up and starting my day after he nurses, OR crawl back in bed for another hour and 1/2! Yesterday the bed was too enticing, so crawl back in I did, and we all ended up going back to sleep until 830! Of course that threw Crazy Girl's schedule all off because she's used to haveing a little bit of mommy and me time before I get Duder out of his crib to nurse again at 9. Today I have decided to use the time for myself, and I have read my scriptures and am now hopefully going to finish a blog update before my morning with two children under the age of two starts!

The real problem in this situation is... the hubs, when he's actually home. :) The poor guy has taken notice that I conk out at about 9pm lately, and that seriously cuts into our couple time when I do that! I've tried everything short of propping my eyelids up with toothpicks to stay awake, to no avail. Granted, I'm only three weeks postpartem here, I really shouldn't be expecting miracles, (no matter that Duder is already a great night sleeper, only getting up once a night to eat!) But that darn elephant in the room keeps stomping around, trumpeting the days until deployment, and I think we're both feeling the pressure to make every moment count, even the little ones in the dark of the night when we're doing nothing more then cuddling on the couch and watching TV. But it really kind of cheapens it for the other when one of us is passed out, snoring softly and drooling a puddle onto his chest. :)



On another note... I've added about a MILLION new military blogs to my list that I follow! I have to say, entering Christina's contest was a great idea! I'm pretty sure I have no chance of winning, ( if you feel like voting for me though, go here!) there are several really beautiful entries that answer the question A LOT better than I did. But my main purpose in joining in was to find more military spouses and hopefully have them find me, which it worked! I actually have a few followers now...crazy huh? :) And I've had a chance to read some thoughts from some really amazing women about military life. All in all, this little cyber-adventure of mine, I would call a success. :)

Now the trick is reading all these new blogs in moderation...instead of spending Crazy Girl's entire nap time on the comp, and wanting to kill myself because I didn't get any of the chores done I was supposed to while she slept! One day at a time, Jen. One day at a time :)

Until next time,